Imagine a bottle of Coke that you have shaken and shaken and shaken until the bottle is hard with pressure. All of that pent up energy has to go somewhere, or it ends up exploding all over the place. For some people, struggling with other mental health issues or going through tough experiences in life can be just like that pressure in a bottle of Coke, and can lead them to trying to find a release or comfort elsewhere. A small amount of people (3.8% of the UK) may turn to self-harming behaviours to help them cope with these challenging times and find a release for their pent up emotions.
Notice the choice of words here: self-harming behaviour. Most of the time, people assume that self harming means that someone cuts themselves but there are many different forms of self harm, from punching walls to pulling hair.
Loads of people think that anyone who self-harms is just doing it for attention. This is so far from the truth. Most people who self-harm are probably looking for someone to listen to them. The reality is that for many students and adults, self-harm is something that they try to hide from other people and may even feel ashamed of. It is used as a coping strategy, a way to release emotions that are building up inside you.
Many people feel that there is a stigma, or judgement, surrounding self-harm and feel awkward if they notice cuts on someone's arms or if they notice someone pulling their hair or pinching themselves. The truth is, seeing evidence of someone's self harm and saying nothing about it is awkward for both parties. Try asking if they're alright, or if there is anything they would like to talk to you about. If they want to open up, then they can, but if they don't, at least they know you care and are there for them.
If you're not sure how to help a friend who you think may be self-harming, then check the 'How Can I Help?' page.
